Make the Yuletide Gay!

Have yourself a merry little Christmas-- and if you haven't already, please consider making the yuletide gay! 🎄 🏳️‍🌈

The holiday season is one of the weirdest times of the year. To some, the holiday season starts bright and early while recovering from a spooky, halloween hangover on the first of November. For others, the fright begins once the drug stores start playing those annoying songs we have all heard way too many times🥲

No matter what you celebrate (if anything at all), the season is full of expectations, and if you're anything like me, you hate 'em. If you're even more like me (gay asf) the holidays present even more challenges.

Sipping hot chocolate with your grandma☕️, ice skating with your childhood friends,⛸attending way too many Christmas parties with way too many glasses of wine 🍷 all seem like great ways to bond with the most beloved people in your life🥰

Well, until.....

Your Grandma asks you when you are going to get a boyfriend😳, your friends ask you if you've been seeing anyone at school😟, your sister tells your family about her new partner😙, your cousin brings her boyfriend to dinner, and all of those other personal questions that go to your head faster than that Pinot noir. Trust me... I've been there, and it is not fun.

The holidays are a time to foster special relationships in your life, not a time to hide behind fear and the comfort of silence. Coming out is scary, especially when you don't want to make the holidays a damn melodrama. But remember, coming it out is no supposed to be dramatic. It is just about opening up and being honest with yourself and your loved ones!💓 After all, the holiday season is all about love. So, why not be honest about what's going on in your love life with those who love you the most, and will most likely continue to love you after the deed has been done.

Here are some tips and reminders during the process of becoming the Gay Cousin (yup, we all have one, or sometimes (sadly) we are the one and only!):😜

1. Beware of Safety, Security, and Micro-aggressions

• Not everyone's family has the same dynamic: whether you have a nuclear family, a divorced family, a blended family, or a family undergoing any type of hardship, coming out is still possible.😋

• Don't overthink the negative reactions anyone MIGHT have. Remind yourself that you are not living for anyone else but yourself and love is not a crime.✊🏻

• But, do be prepared for adverse reactions, which most often manifest as micro-aggressions. Take this is as an opportunity to remain resilient, calm, collected, and educate those who may be reacting out of confusion or shock.😮‍💨

• However, there is one exception: if you fear that coming out could put you in a dangerous situation (homelessness, withdrawal of financial and emotional support, or physical danger), please refrain from doing so.

2. Choose a Word to Identify with That Makes You Feel Good!

• Labels can suck, but they can also be so helpful, explanatory and allow you to identify with a community. (when I came out to my parents, I chose the label "lesbian" so they know there is no chance of me bringing a man home for the holidays next year!!) 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

• If you are still not 100% confident in what you identify as, use phrases like: "I like girls", "I like boys and girls", "I am into everyone!!", "I date women and men", or "I am queer".

2. Divide the Coming-out Process

• First, choose someone you know is gonna have a positive reaction: maybe that's your sibling, your best friend, a coworker, guardian, or even a therapist! This will boost your confidence😎

• Coming out is not a race! Slowly start telling more and more people. Trust me, you'll get to the point where you come out so often it doesn't even feel like coming out anymore. 🥵

• If coming out is too hard for you to do or you don't feel the need to tell someone formally: let someone know they can tell others, to help spread the word! (I admit it, I made my mom tell my dad for me because baby gay me was too nervous--but that's okay) 🤩

3. Other Ways You Can Start the Conversation!

• If you are currently in a relationship or are seeing someone, you can say: "I am seeing a girl", "I am dating someone, her name is", "I am currently interested in a boy", "I have a boyfriend, but I one day I could also have a girlfriend".👩‍❤️‍👩

• If the topic of relationships come up, you can say: "when I get married to a woman or man.." or "this girl i was seeing..", "I went on a date with a girl, and we did this and it was super dope".😻

• Remember, coming out does not have to be a super formal conversation!!! 🤡

• Take a fun route!!! Bake a rainbow cake, send your family a link to a super funny coming out song (I was very tempted to send this to my family in high school), buy a cringey gay t-shirt, or even write a cute note. This takes the awkwardness and seriousness out of something that really shouldn't be. 🤪

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A Quick Note from me, Alexa:

My biggest motivation for all of you baby gays who are thinking about coming out this holiday season... Come out now so one year (hopefully in the near, near future) you can bring your super hot girlfriend (or boyfriend) home for the holidays!!!! Make this holiday season Queermas 🎅 Hanuqueer 🕎 or Qwanzaa!!

As the good gay you are, I'm sure you have already watched Happiest Season (the best lesbian Christmas movie ever created). But if you haven't, click right here to watch it now! Kristen Stewart really comes through for the lesbians with this one. She is our sacrificial lamb, and I love her for it-- well actually I love her no matter what because she is Kristen Stewart. 😻😻

This is my second year of being the gay cousin and I wouldn't have it any other way! 😋🤘🏻😜

- Alexa (Co-Founder) ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜